A friend recently pointed out an article from “Advertising Age” (http://adage.com/cmostrategy/article?article_id=141897) which argues that successful brands do a good job of satisfying people’s ten basic desires. The article, of course, pursues that logic with respect to advertising, but looking at the list, I think these same needs often drive our participation in church communities as well:
What do people want?
- to feel safe and secure
- to feel comfortable
- to be cared for and connected to others
- to be desired by others
- to be free to do what we want
- to grow and become more
- to serve others and give back
- to be surprised and excited
- to believe there is a higher purpose
- to feel that they matter
At times some of these aspirations compete with other’s on the list, but overall it is a good listing of what drives us most of the time. At times, people can be driven by a strong response in only a few of these areas, but a lack of success in meeting these needs will result in people looking elsewhere. We would do well to evaluate our programs on the basis of whether they lead people to find something that meets these desires.
February 8, 2010 at 7:59 pm |
Good list. In honesty, I’m feeling pretty good about 8 out of 10 of these, but not so much #6 and #8. But I’m nearly 70 years old, so maybe growth and surprise are a lot to hope for. What do others think?
February 12, 2010 at 5:10 pm |
I have been pondering what I want ever since I got this blog. I want most of these things, but I look at the list and realize they are quite self-centered. Women are frequently taught to not be self-centered. I know some you were taught “God first, others second, self third”. I was not taught that but I was taught that you should not think only of yourself. This was not a religious list of what they want,but I think that, if honest, most Christians would come up with somewhat the same list. Where on the list are things like “more jobs for poor people” or “better health care for people with a low-income”. I wonder what, if honest, Christians would come up with that they really want.
February 12, 2010 at 11:24 pm |
A blogger I follow today ran a story from her experiences in San Francisco on some sort of study leave. http://www.achurchforstarvingartists.com/2010/02/dancing-saints.html
In it she writes: “I want the church to be like this: good friends who can be completely real with each other, sharing everything from family crises to dreams to old stories to random thoughts to intimate meals. Good food. Good conversation. Prayer. Laughter. Joy. Poignant stories. I want there to be dancing – if not with the feet then with the soul.”
I like that way of putting it. It comes at the list from Advertising Age in a different, but similar, way.
Sharleen asks how justice fits in to the picture…or at least that is how I read the item about the poor and health care. For me, at least, justice is part of serving others, giving back, and having a higher purpose — although the higher purpose is a bit more diffuse as God works through us to mend the world.
February 12, 2010 at 11:15 pm |
If we as church could actually live the Jesus Creed (love God, love other people) wouldn’t we be addressing, at least to some extent, all the needs listed here? I wonder if it’s our programs we need to evaluate or our basic attitudes and ways of dealing with each other.
I have thought a great deal about Greg’s “The Messiah is among you” story. What do you think happened in that monastery when the monks began to look at each person as if he might be the Messiah? What did they do and say that was different from what they had done before? What was it that captured the attention of the citizenry and caused them to believe that something remarkable was going on there?
What would does (or would) “loving each other” look like in this congregation? Why is there such a gulf between the feelings of being loved or rejected among members of our congregation. How do visitors see us with respect to our regard–love–for each other and the world?
sjh
February 12, 2010 at 11:41 pm |
I think it would have to mean that we spend more time with each other, listening to each other’s stories, and creating a common story together.
In a way that is odd, because we already spend several hours a week together, but somehow during that time we aren’t always building relationships across our smaller peer groups. I think we need to change the nature of our time together to focus on the more important things.
February 13, 2010 at 12:09 am |
Yes, Barry, I think you’re right. We do spend time together, but we rarely do anything during that time that builds relationships. Actually, very little of that time is spent in small groups.
I am hoping that we will begin to do some of that on Wednesday nights.
February 15, 2010 at 11:56 am |
This by John Birkimer:
What other kinds of activities could help us build community? Sharleen and I are planning to start up the potluck dinners we did a couple of years ago, open to the first n people who call or email. Are there other things some of you can think of? If so, please comment.
February 16, 2010 at 2:13 am |
Yesterday a CHBC visitor reminded me that being a visitor or being new can be intimidating and needs direct action from us. In talking after the service, she told me that she was interested in the “prophets” class, but no one had invited her to participate. I said that the invitation had been given in several worship services because everyone is welcome, and she replied, “But no one has invited me. Sometimes visitors need to be specifically invited; I don’t feel free to initiate except to volunteer” (which she had just done). She said that she had filled out the red book every time she has visited, but that she hasn’t heard anything from anyone.
Here we are: this is definitely one “thing people want” that we can do something about.
February 16, 2010 at 8:01 pm |
The list if very comprehensive and I would concur, but how to translate that into action is still elusive for me. When my family visited another church, the next week they received a letter from the Priest, the children received a personal note from the director of children’s programs and a letter from the children’s music director. Did they feel wanted? You bet they did!
Some of us do find our sense of community, but we get too comfortable within that group and forget there are others within the larger community.